Barry on Buffalo

Which Buffalo Bills player was cleared of charges of murdering his ex-wife, only to have civil charges brought against him by his alleged victim’s family? 

Tough one, huh?

OJ Simpson? No, not him (well… yeah), but. ..

I’m actually talking about OJ’s teammate for three years, Defensive Tackle, Jim Dunaway (pronounced “done away”).  The University of Mississippi star  (nicknamed “the monster of Ole Miss”) played for the Bills in the 1960s-70s and apparently “done away” with his ex in 1998.  (I have to give Williamsville Bob credit for that one).  But, I will say that he certainly was suspected to be a “monster to his Ole Miss” in this case.

For all you conspiracy theorists out there, one obvious common denominator is that Dunaway played side-by-side in 1970 with OJ’s buddy and white Bronco chauffer, Al “AC” Cowlings.  Some other prominent common roster links include ESPN’s analyst, Paul Maguire and former Vice Presidential candidate, Jack Kemp.     Hmmmm,  very, very interesting.  Possibly the next case for Sherblog Holmes?  For those who want more on the Dunaway saga, here it is…   

Wikipedia on Dunaway:  In 1998, Dunaway’s ex-wife, Nonniel Dunaway was found dead in a half-empty swimming pool. An autopsy revealed that she had a fractured skull and was unconscious when she was placed in the water by her assailant where she drowned. Prior to this event, Nonniel had won a divorce judgement which gave her more than 800 acres of property that the couple owned, $1800 a month in alimony and half of Dunaway’s NFL pension. They had been divorced since 1995 and Dunaway was planning to appeal.

Dunaway was charged with her murder but a grand jury chose not to indict Dunaway of the charges. In response, his children filed a wrongful death lawsuit, alleging that Dunaway was responsible for their mother’s death. In 2002, Dunaway was found liable and ordered to pay $579,000 to his children.

After reading some of the negative criticism of Paul McCartney’s ex-wife, Heather Mills in the comments lately, I decided to call on our British investigative reporter, Sherblog Holmes, to find out what the real reason was that this star-studded couple broke up.  Sherblog has obtained exclusive copies of the sealed divorce papers and it appears that Sir Paul, probably the most beloved pop icon in the history of mankind, was, in fact, totally misunderstood by this beautiful, yet, one-legged woman.   The divorce claim was centered around three distinct events involving Heather’s disability: 

1. Paul, the ever mischievous practical jokester, was watching the classic movie, A Christmas Story with his young daughter and they playfully decided to turn Mommy’s artificial leg into a replica of the lamp that Darren McGavin was so proud of in the movie.  They wrapped it and left it under the Christmas tree.  Our sources tell us that apparently, all hell broke loose on Christmas morning in the McCartney household.
2. Thankfully, they recovered from that event, but Heather further over-reacted after discovering that Paul, the impish rascal, had taken her only spare leg and had it re-conditioned into a guitar for good buddy Eric Clapton’s 60^th birthday! 
3. If that wasn’t enough, when she finally had it replaced, Paul, that teasing scalawag, with his equally puckish old pal, Ringo Starr, couldn’t help themselves one night when Heather was away, by using their famous artistic abilities (and who knows what else), to paint the prosthesis to look like a yellow submarine! Upon her return that night, a terrible shouting match ensued and a servant in the house was quoted as saying, “After Heather threatened divorce over the incident, I heard Ringo chirp from one of the guest bedrooms, ‘Heather you don’t have a leg to stand on!’”  Oh, that’s just rich.  

The woman who obviously couldn’t take a joke, decided it was time to take a hop, I mean hike.  I don’t want to be too critical, as she is pretty hot and has done a lot of good charity work, but c’mon Heather, lighten up.